


Dread it, Run from it

by Alyx17



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Chitauri invasion, Hand to Hand Combat, Help, How Do I Tag, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Bad At Tagging, Infinity War, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Tony Stark Has A Heart, Training
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-05
Updated: 2018-06-19
Packaged: 2019-03-13 22:35:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,504
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13580343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alyx17/pseuds/Alyx17
Summary: As a Chitauri warship looms overhead, public panic mounts and Earth calls upon its mightiest heroes.Peter Parker has a long way to go before he's ready to fight in Infinity War, but he won't be involved anyway. Not if Tony has anything to say about it.





	1. Chapter 1

Tony had never felt like an intruder in the Avengers compound, but he supposed there was a first time for everything. He looked up from where he was brooding to see Steve and Nat embracing. Nearby, Wanda and Vision sat together, each talking over the other as they accounted for their time spent apart. Sam, Scott, and Clint stood murmuring with their heads together.

 

Sighing, Tony shifted his gaze to the only other person in the room keeping to himself. Peter was leaning against a wall, tense and alert. He hadn’t stopped fidgeting with the strings of his sweatshirt since he’d entered the compound. Sensing Tony watching him, Peter turned to meet Tony’s eyes. Tony turned away pointedly.

 

The news that a Chitauri warship was looming over Earth had spread like wildfire. The battle of New York was still fresh in the public’s memory, and as the warship came closer and closer, pressure mounted to present a united front against the inevitable invasion. Support for the accords paled. Presidential pardons were issued to Steve and the other fugitive Avengers. Secretary of State Ross had resigned in indignation, addressing a global audience with ominous warnings. An atmosphere of barely contained panic had settled over the people of Earth and propelled them to call upon their mightiest defenders. Today, for the first time since the accords were dissolved, they convened at the Avengers compound.

 

Tony looked over the fractured remnants of the team.  Half of them had been living as fugitives, and the strain showed. Steve had even grown a beard, his eyes haunted and his face drawn. Finally, Steve broke away from Nat and approached Tony. “Can we talk?”

 

Tony shrugged in an attempted display of indifference. Steve sat down beside him.

 

“You never called,” Steve said finally.

 

Tony opened his mouth to reply and then shut it again. He cleared his throat, deciding not to respond to Steve’s statement. “So what’s the game plan?”

 

Steve frowned a little. Then, “We do some intensive training. Gather as much intel as we can.”

 

Tony nodded. “They’ve got Rhodey leading a special ops team. They’re trying to map a trajectory for where the…ship…might land.”

 

Steve grunted in acknowledgement. He cast his gaze around the room, his brow furrowing as he noticed Peter for the first time. “Who’s that?”

 

Tony grimaced.

***

_“No, Peter.”_

_“No?! This thing is—“_

_“You said you weren’t ready.”_

_“Well yeah-- but that was before we were about to be invaded by_ aliens _!” Peter gesticulated wildly, his face flushed. “You said I could join before, why is now any different?”_

_“You don’t understand what we’re fighting here. You haven’t seen_ them. _Not like we have. Peter, the last time the Chitauri came to Earth…” Tony trailed off uncomfortably._

 

_Peter hesitated. “If I don’t understand, then teach me. Tell me how to—“_

_“No,” said Tony firmly._

_Peter’s eyes narrowed. “You need everyone you can get. Do you think I can’t see what’s going on? They pardoned Captain America and the others. They’ve called on all people with powers to ready defenses. That can only mean that this thing is huge. It’s bigger than any of us. A lot of people are going to die if we don’t win. Maybe even_ everyone _. How can you ask me to just stay out of it?”_

_“Because,” said Tony flatly. “You’re just a—“_

_“Don’t,” said Peter. “Don’t say it. Are you actually telling me that the fate of the entire world is not worth me risking my—“_

_“YES!” roared Tony, interrupting._

_Peter fell silent, his eyes widening in shock. Tony was breathing hard, his fists clenched. He closed his eyes, feeling the weight of what he’d just said. For a moment, Peter looked shaken, but his features quickly rearranged into an expression of defiant resolve. “You can’t stop me.”_

_***_

 

“He’s—“ began Tony, but Peter interrupted him.

 

“Peter,” said Peter. “Parker.”

 

Steve’s brow furrowed. He chuckled a little. “I guess the more appropriate question might be why are you here?”

 

For the briefest moment, Tony saw Peter look to him uncertainly. Tony waited with bated breath—the kid had always protected his identity fiercely, yet here he was, unmasked, in the company of a bunch of people who had no idea what he really was.

 

Peter returned his gaze to Steve. He cleared his throat, visibly gathering his nerve. Tony noticed that his clenched hands were shaking, but his voice was quite steady when he answered. “I’m Spider-Man.”

 

The silence that descended was deafening. Steve continued to stare at Peter as if he hadn’t spoken. The others had turned, gawking at Peter. Wanda had actually covered her mouth with her hands. 

 

Everyone started to talk at once.

 

“ _This_ is the guy from Berlin?” asked Clint.

 

“Holy shit, since when do you recruit kids?!” demanded Sam.

 

“Tony, are you serious?” Natasha added.

 

“What the fuck—“ began Scott.

 

Tony stood. “Alright, enough! Enough!”

 

Peter stood his ground under the onslaught, keeping his head up with effort.

 

Everyone fell silent. Steve finally turned away from Peter, meeting Tony’s eyes. There was something familiar in his gaze. Something dangerous. “Can we talk? Alone?”

                 

***

“Before you say anything—“

 

“He’s a kid, Tony! Jesus. A _kid._ ”

 

“You think I don’t know that? You think I wanted him here?”

 

Steve crossed his arms. “Then what is he _doing_ here?”

 

Tony started talking. He told Steve about the YouTube videos of Spider-Man, about how pitifully easy it had been for FRIDAY to triangulate the kid’s apartment. “You should have seen him… he was fighting armed criminals in his _pajamas_ …”

 

“So what—you made him the suit? A teenaged kid?”

 

“He was already out there. I thought I could at least keep him safer than he would be on his own.”

 

“So you brought him to _Berlin?!_ ”

“I though it would be a good road test… I knew everyone would be pulling their punches.”

 

Steve looked incredulous.

 

“Okay, maybe it wasn’t my best idea! I was desperate! A situation I never would have been in if _you_ hadn’t convinced everyone to go rogue.”

 

Steve’s eyes narrowed. “This isn’t about us, Tony. It’s about the kid.”

 

Tony felt a retort building in his chest but he restrained himself. “Fine.” He returned to telling Steve about Peter, about how he’d defeated the Vulture, how Tony had offered him a spot on the team and he’d declined. Steve’s grim disapproval had gradually dissolved as Tony spoke, and finally he just looked distinctly impressed.

 

“It sounds like this kid is something special,” Steve allowed.

 

“He wants to help us fight this— _thing._ Whatever it is.”

 

“And you don’t think he should?”

 

Tony gaped at Steve. “What—you think I’m wrong?”

 

Steve shrugged. “It seems you thought he proved himself enough to offer him a spot on the Avengers. Besides, we aren’t exactly in the position to turn people down.”

 

Tony’s face contorted with fury. “Always the soldier, huh? What about when it was _your_ buddy on the line against what was best for everyone else? Not so self-sacrificing then, were you?”

 

“Tony…”

 

“I can see I’m going to be outvoted on this. Just—“ Tony swallowed. “Whatever plan you come up with—keep him off the front line.”

 

Steve looked slightly taken aback. “You… really care about him.”

 

Tony didn’t respond.

 


	2. Chapter 2

For a moment, Tony could almost imagine that the accords and everything that followed had never taken place. Just like old times, they grouped around Steve, waiting for his directives. In the past, Tony might have made a jab at Steve, calling him the star spangled man with a plan. He didn’t feel like joking now. The sight of Peter sitting awkwardly between Natasha and Clint was an obvious reminder that the past was gone.

 

“Rhodey’s been pulled in to collaborate with the government on creating a projection for where this thing might be landing,” started Steve. 

 

“Do we know for a fact that this ship is Chitauri?” Nat asked.

 

Tony chimed in. “Looks like it, from the renderings. I can’t say we know _anything_ for sure at this point.”

 

Steve nodded. “Bruce was studying some of the Chitauri energy cores before he—“

 

Natasha looked up sharply.

 

“Left,” finished Steve. He avoided her gaze. “I think Tony should continue that work, see if we can find some sort of weak point in their technology. I think it’s safe to assume that the Chitauri Loki brought to Earth were only the tip of the iceberg. Clearly they’ve got more numbers than we saw last time… and someone new to take orders from, too.”

 

Tony grunted in acknowledgement of his assignment. “I’ve been storing some of the Chitauri energy cores. I’ll try to dig up what Banner was working on.”

 

Steve inclined his head at Tony, then turned his attention back to the group as a whole. “We’re going to need to start some intensive training. We have to get back in the habit of working as a team or we don’t stand a chance against what’s coming.”

 

Natasha bit her lip. Tony visibly winced. The tension in the air was suddenly palpable. Without meaning to, the group had seated themselves according to their “side” in what the media had dubbed their “Civil War.” All except Peter, who looked even more uncomfortable than he had done. He was looking from Tony to Steve with a furrowed brow.

 

“We’ll start at 7 AM in the training yard,” said Steve. “Everyone get some rest.”

 

***

Peter hoisted his duffel bag up onto his shoulder, making his way up the stairs to his room. Tony had told him to take the room across from Vision’s, indicating that he hadn’t filled it since Peter was offered his spot on the Avengers. Peter felt a slight pang at that, but when he tried to say goodnight to Tony he’d already turned away to his own bedroom.

 

As he entered the room, Peter registered that it reflected his suit’s color scheme, muted reds and blues with luxurious mahogany furniture. Once again, Tony had demonstrated his proclivity for going over the top. A vast desk housed a high-tech computer and a work bench bustled with various tools and gadgetry. Peter noticed a gigantic framed photograph of the Queens skyline adorning the wall above his bed. When he opened the dresser to put his clothes away, he saw that Tony had already filled it with t-shirts. The top one depicted a cat in a box and said “WANTED: SCHRODINGER’S CAT, DEAD & ALIVE.” Unbidden, a lump rose in his throat. He swallowed hard to dispel it.

 

A sudden knock at the door made Peter jump. He closed his dresser and answered the door to see _Captain America_ standing in the doorway, looking slightly tense. Peter gaped.

 

“Hi,” said Steve gently. “I—can I come in?”

 

Peter nodded wordlessly, moving aside for Steve. As dire as their situation was, Peter couldn’t help but be a little flustered by the presence of one of his childhood heroes.

 

“Okay if I sit?” asked Steve, gesturing towards the bed.

 

Peter nodded again. Steve sat, patting the mattress beside him as he did so. Peter obliged, looking up at Steve earnestly.

 

“I’ll admit,” said Steve heavily, “I was pretty upset with Tony for recruiting someone so young, but after everything he’s told me, I’m really impressed.”

 

Peter tried and failed to look composed. “Th-thanks,” he stuttered.

 

“I know Tony is less than thrilled about you being here.”

 

Peter’s sighed. “Mr. Stark doesn’t understand.”

 

“He’s trying to protect you.”

 

Peter bit his lip. “I know,” he finally mumbled. “But, I—I have to be here. If there’s even a _chance_ I can help to stop it. I can’t live with the alternative.”

 

Steve half-smiled at Peter. “I know that feeling better than just about anyone, kid. But no one would blame you if you changed your mind.”

 

Peter crossed his arms resolutely over his chest. “I’m staying.”

 

“Alright then,” said Steve. “Let’s talk about tomorrow. I want you training in hand-to-hand. From what I’ve seen and heard you rely pretty heavily on your ranged attacks and your webs, which has been doing well for you, but you need to be able to handle yourself in close quarters.”

 

Peter nodded, clenching his teeth to stop them from chattering in his nervousness. He was eager to start proving himself to Steve. “I—will I be training with you?” he asked.

 

Steve shook his head. “I need to oversee things. I’m putting you with Nat. She’s the best at hand-to-hand, anyway.”

 

Peter gawked at Steve. “I’m training with _Black Widow_?” 

 

Steve grinned. “Don’t worry, Nat’s bark is much worse than her bite.”

 

Peter looked nonplussed. Steve patted him on the shoulder. “Get some sleep, okay, kid? You’ll need it.”

 

***

Tony paced around his bedroom. He knew that he needed sleep but was unable to face being alone with his thoughts. Finally, he could take it no more and headed for his workshop, hoping that a couple of hours of tinkering would calm him enough to make sleep attainable.

 

He jumped about a foot in the air when he saw Steve sitting at one of his workbenches, brooding. “Jesus, Rogers. Warn a person.”

 

“I thought I’d find you here,” said Steve. “I know this stuff helps you and I won’t keep you from it, but there’s one more thing I need to talk to you about.”

 

Tony raised an eyebrow, but jerked his head to indicate that Steve should continue.

 

Steve cleared his throat. “I came here from Wakanda. T’Challa agreed to have one of the Wakandan doctors try to erase what Hydra did from Bucky’s mind. Bucky… he’s awake.”

 

With effort, Tony held out against the tumultuous flood of emotions threatening to overtake him. “That’s good,” he said in his best attempt at an off-handed tone.

 

Steve wasn’t deceived. “I know, Tony. I know that I shouldn’t have kept what Bucky did from you. But this—Bucky will want to help.”

 

Tony turned robotically to face Steve. “You want to bring him here,” he said.

 

Steve’s eyes widened earnestly. Tony felt like punching him in the face. “You know I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t think he was 100% free of Hydra’s brainwashing. You have the final say, of course, but we need everyone we can get, Tony.”

 

Tony swallowed his pride. It felt a lot like swallowing shards of glass. He shrugged indifferently. “Yeah,” he said sluggishly. “Yeah, okay.”

 

Steve stood to his feet. “Thanks, Tony. I’ll—leave you to it, then.”

 

Tony nodded again. Steve ascended the stairs out of the workshop. Tony waited until he was well out of earshot before hurling the nearest wrench at the concrete wall.

 

***

 

Peter looked nervous. His face was practically green as Steve gathered the team together to receive their training instructions for the morning. “Nat,” he said. “You’ll be training Peter in hand-to-hand. Vis, Sam, Tony…you’ll be running flight patterns. Scott, Wanda, and Clint—stealth attacks. Clear?”

 

The group muttered agreement. “I’ll move around to discuss the specifics with each group.”

 

As the others dispersed to their respective areas of the compound, Peter followed Natasha to the boxing ring, his heart pounding so loudly he was surprised she couldn’t hear it. Without preamble, Natasha clambered gracefully into the ring. She nodded to Peter and Peter climbed up into the ring beside her, fidgeting. It felt strange to be contemplating a fight without wearing his suit. He felt ridiculously vulnerable in track pants and a t-shirt. Natasha was dressed similarly, yet still managed to look formidable. She gave him a small smile.

 

Then, without warning, her foot was flying through the air, aimed straight at Peter’s stomach. His spider-sense shrieked at the base of his skull and just in time he pulled back from her kick.

 

She nodded approvingly. “They said you were fast,” she said. “Nice reflexes.”

 

Peter, still shaken, acknowledged her with something embarrassingly close to a squeak.

 

Natasha raised an eyebrow. “Come on, kid, relax.”

 

Without warning she continued her onslaught, throwing kicks and punches in rapid succession with Peter just managing to dodge each blow. Finally, one of Natasha's kicks caught him square in the chest and he stumbled back from her, wheezing slightly.

 

"Is this just your thing?" asked Natasha.

 

"What?"

 

"Evasion. Not fighting back."

 

Peter shrugged. "N-not really," he admitted. "I mean, I--"

 

Natasha raised an eyebrow. 

 

"I fight people who are doing bad things, sure, but... it feels weird to try and hurt you when we're on the same side."

 

Natasha folded her arms, narrowing her eyes suspiciously. "This isn't some sexist thing, is it?"

 

Peter flushed, holding up his hands. "N-no! Nothing like that! I mean, I--as a rule, I d-don't like to, uh, hurt girls... women! I mean women. Sorry, you're not, a, uh, girl..."

 

A distant chuckle made Peter look up to see Steve watching them.

 

Peter flushed even more. "C-captain, how long were you--?"

 

"Long enough," answered Steve. "Look kid, we're all on the same side here. The reason we fight is to help each other prepare for what's coming. Get out of the ring for a second."

 

Peter obliged, stepping down as Steve stepped up, turning to face Natasha.

 

"I can't even remember the last time we sparred," said Natasha grinning as she slid into a fighting stance.

 

Steve returned her smile, raising his hands. "Take it easy on me," he said.

 

"Never."

 

Steve threw the first punch. Natasha easily dodged, retaliating with an attempt to sweep Steve's feet out from under him. Steve jumped, answering with another punch of his own that caught Natasha’s jaw, snapping her head back. She recovered impossibly fast with a particularly vicious kick at Steve’s face that he blocked just in time with a slight grunt of pain. Natasha smirked as Steve recoiled in an attempt to regain his balance, but he was too late. She’d jumped, one leg on either side of Steve’s head as she swiftly flipped Steve over her. He landed with incredible force on his back, groaning slightly. Natasha landed gracefully, wiping a streak of blood from the corner of her mouth where Steve had punched her.

 

“I hate that one,” Steve complained.

 

Natasha smirked. She reached out a hand, helping Steve to his feet. “You left yourself open. You have to recover from your blocks faster.”

 

“You’re the one who left yourself wide open for a face shot,” grumbled Steve.

 

Both turned to Peter who stood staring incredulously.

 

“Ready to give it another try, Peter?” Steve asked.

 

Peter nodded. Natasha extended a hand to him and hoisted him into the ring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think!! I live for feedback/comments :)


	3. Chapter 3

Peter faced Natasha for a second time, switching out with Steve as he clambered out of the ring. Steve crossed his arms, nodding to indicate that they should begin sparring again. Natasha slid into a fighting stance and Peter echoed her, trying to calm himself.

 

Natasha looked him over appraisingly. “Stand more at an angle,” she said. “You’re making yourself a bigger target.”

 

Peter adjusted himself. “Like this?”

 

Natasha nodded. She moved towards him, taking his right hand in hers and moving it higher.  “Keep your back hand closer to your face. You won’t be able to block as quickly with it down at chest level like that.”

 

Peter nodded, bracing himself as Natasha started another attack. She spun quickly, aiming a kick at Peter’s face that he blocked with the hand she had just readjusted. “Wow,” said Peter. “You were right, that was really—“

 

Natasha elbowed Peter hard in the chest, cutting him off mid-sentence. He stumbled back. “Don’t get distracted,” she chastised.

 

Peter continued dodging and weaving as Natasha kept attacking. He reminded himself of what he had seen, how Natasha could clearly take a hit… but never before had Peter thrown a punch at anyone without pulling it considerably. He knew what he was capable of—the first few months of testing his strength had taught him that he was strong enough to kill someone if he wasn’t very careful.

 

“Come on, Peter,” called Steve. “Fight back!”

 

Peter closed his eyes briefly, feeling his spider sense radiating through his spine. He felt rather than saw Natasha’s punch flying towards him. In a split second, he caught her fist, turned her roughly aside and landing a powerful punch to her stomach.

 

For the briefest of moments, Natasha doubled over with a grunt of pain. Peter dropped his fighting stance at once, hurrying closer to her. “I’m so sorry! Are you—“

 

Peter never finished his sentence. Natasha swept his feet out from under him with enough force to land him flat on his back, the wind knocked out of him. She stood over him with a smirk. “Don’t get distracted,” she said again, reaching out a hand to pull him back to his feet. As he stood beside her she gave him the smallest of smiles. “Better,” she allowed.

 

As the days went by, Peter’s hand-to-hand combat skills improved beyond all recognition. He’d already had the strength and reflexes to be an apt close-range fighter, but Natasha’s techniques had honed his abilities.  One memorable afternoon, he even managed to knock Natasha to the ground. Steve and the others sometimes sparred with him too, rotating under Steve’s training plan to practice hand-to-hand.

 

Once in a while, Peter thought he saw Tony out of the corner of his eye watching the sparring sessions, but whenever he tried to look properly he was never there.

 

The team settled back into something resembling normalcy as they lived and trained together. Even Steve and Tony had started to throw hesitant jabs at each other again. Peter had ingratiated himself with the team nearly overnight, as Tony knew that he would. Everyone adored him, and the rift in the team seemed to ease as they found common ground in teasing, advising, and protecting Peter. Still though, Tony avoided being alone with him.

 

Tony knew that Peter thought he was angry with him. He saw the kid trying to catch his eye at mealtimes and between training sessions but Cap kept them all so busy that Tony hoped it was feasible that he just hadn’t had time to catch up with him. The truth was that any time he looked at Peter he felt the tenuous peace he’d started to make with the situation start to crumble.

 

Things might have continued that way, slowly and steadily rebuilding, if Bucky hadn’t arrived at the compound. Tony heard FRIDAY’s alert as if it were coming to him from a million miles away. When Tony didn’t respond to the announcement, FRIDAY prompted him. “Sir, should I initiate a lockdown?”

 

Tony shook his head in an attempt to clear it. “No. Let him in.”

 

The rest of the team had gathered in the entranceway. They watched with bated breath as Bucky crossed the threshold into the compound, glancing around nervously. Steve hurried forward and he and Bucky embraced like brothers. Everyone else greeted Bucky as well, some more hesitantly than others. Finally, Bucky reached Tony and Tony reluctantly held out his hand. Bucky met Tony’s eyes with clear surprise, searching for something like acceptance in Tony’s face. Tony did his best to give him an approximation of what he thought that expression might look like. Tony relaxed slightly as Bucky shook his hand and turned away.

 

Steve introduced Bucky to Peter. Bucky recovered quickly from his astonishment at Peter’s age with a quip about how annoying Peter had been in Germany. Natasha moved towards them, ruffling Peter’s hair. “Wait until you see this little punk in the ring,” she said. “He’s got the potential to be even more annoying than he was in Germany.”

 

Peter beamed with pride. “What about a rematch?!” he joked, looking up at Bucky. “Think you can take on Spider-Man?”

 

Steve looked anxiously at Tony who felt as if his stomach were full of writhing snakes. He gave his best attempt at a casual grin.

 

“Pete, I don’t think we have time to spar anymore tonight,” said Steve slowly.

 

Peter looked visibly disappointed. “Come on… just one fight?”

 

 Bucky gave a pained chuckle, looking to Tony. Tony gave a stiff nod. “It’s alright, Steve,” Bucky said. “I’ve been sitting for hours on that jet, it might be good for me to get out a little energy.”

 

Natasha clapped her hands together. “Are we taking bets?” she asked eagerly, looking around at everyone.

 

Tony knew that he, Steve, and Bucky were the only ones that understood what Bucky’s return meant for Tony. Tony had never shared with the others what he had seen in Siberia, partially because he could hardly stand to face it himself. He still had nightmares about the footage.

 

The others were heckling each other and taking sides. Wanda had even started to pop popcorn. Tony felt faintly sick, but knew he couldn’t leave. Not now. He didn’t want anyone else to know what had happened in Siberia. Besides, he was going to have to get used to having Bucky around sooner or later.

 

Tony followed the rest of the team to the boxing ring. Peter and Bucky entered the ring, each standing in opposite corners. Peter adapted a dramatic fighting stance, jumping in place on the balls of his feet. Wanda passed around bowls of popcorn as Sam assumed his best commentator’s voice. “In one corner of the ring we have Peter Benjamin Parker, weighing in at 85 pounds—“

 

“Hey!” Peter glared. “I weigh 140 pounds, for your information—“

 

Sam laughed. “Ok, ok. 140 pounds … Spider-Man!”

 

The others cheered.

 

 “And in the other corner of the ring, weighing in at 210, I give you… Bucky Barnes!”

 

Peter was making a big show of throwing his hands up at the cheering Avengers, garnering louder applause.

 

Bucky cocked an amused eyebrow. “You’ve got the crowd.”

 

Peter grinned. “Always do.”

 

They started fighting. Bucky was clearly reluctant to hit Peter at first but quickly recovered from that as he came to realize Peter’s strength and agility. He grinned, throwing his full effort into the fight as fists and feet soared through the air, each dodging and neither gaining an inch. The team watched, completely mesmerized.

 

It happened so quickly that later Tony could hardly recall the specifics. All he knew was that Bucky had reached out to block Peter’s forward motion and his metal hand had found Peter’s chest just above his collarbone.  For a moment, Bucky’s hand was silhouetted against Peter’s throat.

 

In that moment, Tony didn’t see Peter. He saw his mother as the life was choked from her by the very same man that was in front of him now. He wasn’t aware of making the decision to climb up into the ring in the thick of the fight, but he was suddenly between Peter and Bucky. Peter stopped his retaliatory strike just in time to avoid hitting Tony. “Mr. Stark!” he cried out in shock.

 

“Enough!” roared Tony. He was pushing Peter back from under Bucky’s hand to the far corner of the ring, shielding him with his body as he turned to face Bucky. “Enough,” he said again venomously.


	4. Chapter 4

It took Tony entirely too long to realize that someone was talking about him. That someone was talking _at_ him. That someone was possibly even talking _to_ him. He’d shut his eyes tight against the onslaught of the first panic attack he’d experienced since just after Siberia, feeling the familiar constriction in his chest. He was breathing hard, but for all the relief it brought him he may as well have been breathing through a straw.

 

“Tony? Tony, can you hear me?” someone asked, closer now.   

 

With enormous effort, Tony wrenched his eyes open to see Rhodey standing in front of him with his hands on his shoulders. He hadn’t felt Rhodey approach. He nodded weakly.

 

Rhodey put his arm around Tony, supporting him. “Come on, man. Let’s go.”

 

Tony nodded again, allowing himself to be helped from the room, leaving a weighty silence behind him.  

***

Steve and Bucky exchanged significant looks as Tony and Rhodey left. Steve wanted to run after Tony, but he knew that Tony would resent this show of vulnerability. Perhaps it was best to pretend that it hadn’t happened at all. Steve knew that he was probably the last person that Tony wanted to see right now, anyway.

 

“What the hell was _that?_ ” asked Natasha, finally shattering the stunned silence.

 

No one answered. Peter looked incredulous. “What’s wrong with Mr. Stark?”

 

An expression of resignation crossed Bucky’s face and Steve knew what he was going to do a split second before he did it. “It’s my fault,” he said.

 

“What do you mean?” asked Peter.

 

“Buck,” warned Steve, but Bucky dismissed him with a quick shake of his head.

 

“I—killed Tony’s parents.”

 

For a moment, no one said anything as they all attempted to process this. Peter backed away from Bucky as a look of abject horror consumed his features. “Y-you… what?! What are you talking about? Mr. Stark told me that his parents died in a car crash!”

 

“Kid,” said Steve softly. He put his hand on Peter’s shoulder. “It’s complicated…”

 

“ _Complicated_?!” Peter demanded, looking angry now. He threw Steve’s hand off of him. “You heard him, he just said he killed Mr. Stark’s mom and dad!”

 

Steve looked around at the others and saw that they were shocked and angry, too. Clint looked positively menacing and Natasha had crossed her arms over her chest. Wanda’s hands were glowing faintly with red energy and Sam was shaking his head in disbelief. Scott looked too surprised to do anything at all. Only Vision remained calm, his expression pensive.

 

“Hydra had control of his mind,” said Steve. “He had no choice.”

 

The others looked at Bucky to corroborate that statement. Bucky bowed his head. “Yeah,” he said quietly. “But I still did it.”

 

***

“Tony,” said Rhodey firmly. “Tell me what’s going on.”

 

Tony shook his head. “Nothing. Panic attack. I’m fine.”

 

“Cut the bullshit, Tony, I know when you’re lying.”

 

Tony glared at him. “You _know_ I have panic attacks.”

 

“I also know that it’s been months since your last attack. Now tell me what happened. Was it Bucky? Was it the kid?”

 

Tony grimaced at Bucky’s name and Rhodey raised an eyebrow. “What is it, Tony? Tell me.”

 

Tony met his friend’s concerned gaze with every intention of lying, but felt his resolve crumble at the earnest look on Rhodey’s face. Suddenly, he felt crushed beneath the screaming weight of the footage he’d seen in Siberia. It pained him to admit it, but it was something he was no longer capable of keeping to himself. He took a beat, mentally preparing for what would come next. “He… killed my parents.”

 

***

Peter made to exit the ring, but Steve stood in his path. “Get out of my way,” said Peter in a low dangerous voice that didn’t suit him.

 

Steve winced. “Peter, just listen to him. Give us five minutes.”

 

Peter ignored him. He pushed past Steve and climbed out of the ring, going in the direction that he’d seen Rhodey leave with Tony.  He heard their voices from an adjacent room and pounded on the door. “Mr. Stark!”

 

Peter heard shuffling on the other side of the door and Rhodey appeared, looking solemn. “Kid, now’s not really—“

 

Peter ignored Rhodey. “I need to talk to Mr. Stark,” he said breathlessly, attempting to force his way into the room.

 

“It’s okay, Rhodey,” Tony muttered from within the room.

 

Rhodey’s brow furrowed, but he exited past Peter, heading back for the sparring area to rejoin the others. Peter entered and closed the door, surveying Tony where he sat looking pale and a little dazed. Peter approached him cautiously. “I know you’re mad at me for being here,” he said slowly. “But I just want to tell you that—“

 

Tony cut him off with a wry chuckle. “You think I’m mad?”

 

Peter deflated, stopping mid-sentence to stare blankly at Tony. “Aren’t you?”

 

“ _Mad?_ More like scared shitless.”

 

Peter cocked his head to the side, his eyes widening a little. “I didn’t think that you were really scared of anything.”

 

Tony felt a visceral wrench. The fearless mask that he’d put on over the years was one full of cracks, and he never imagined that he’d pulled off the performance he was constantly putting on. Here, though, was this kid, who’d bought the whole act hook, line, and sinker. He surveyed Peter carefully and detected no trace of sarcasm. He groaned. “Good God, you’re actually serious, aren’t you?”

 

Peter didn’t say anything. Tony sighed heavily, too exhausted to keep up appearances, even for the sake of the kid’s idea of him. “I’ve been in an almost constant state of terror since the battle of New York,” he admitted. “This thing that’s coming for us… I guess I always knew that it would, ever since that day. There’s so much more that’s out there…what I saw that day was only the tip of the iceberg. All of us, here, are so small in comparison. How do we stand a chance against something like that?”

 

Peter frowned a little, waiting for Tony to continue. He wasn’t sure it was the kind of question that really wanted an answer.

 

“Keeping you out of this fight was supposed to keep me sane,” said Tony. “I can’t—“ Tony trailed off uncomfortably, clearing his throat. “I can’t lose you.”

 

“I know what you mean,” said Peter softly. “The thought of losing one more person is too horrible to even think about.”

 

Tony furrowed his brow slightly at that. “We aren’t talking about just me anymore, are we?”

 

Peter bit his lip. “I know that May is with Pepper and Happy in the safe house that you set up. But if something happens to her… she’s the only family I have left.” He paused, then grinned a little embarrassedly. “Well—maybe not the _only_ family I have left,” he said, looking up at Tony.

 

For the briefest of moments, Peter thought he saw Tony’s features arrange into an unfathomable expression, but when he blinked it was gone. Tony nodded, which Peter knew was about as much emotional expression he would get from the older man. They sat in silence for a moment until Peter finally broached the subject that had brought him here. “So… Bucky. Did he… really kill your mom and dad?”

 

Tony looked up sharply. “Who told you that?”

 

Peter gestured vaguely over his shoulder. “Bucky did. He told everyone.”

 

Tony put his head in his hands. “Shit.”

 

“Why is he here, Mr. Stark?”

 

Tony sighed. “Bucky was brainwashed by Hydra. He’s carried out countless missions on their behalf. One of those missions was to assassinate my parents.” Tony frowned a little. “No, that’s not quite right. To assassinate my dad, but my mom was there as a witness, so. They made it look like a car accident.”

 

Peter was watching Tony raptly. “It almost sounds like you were there.”

 

“I wasn’t. There was—footage.”

 

Peter looked faintly sick. “You _saw_ Bucky kill your parents?”

 

Tony didn’t answer. He didn’t have to.

 

“Why didn’t you say something?” asked Peter. “Why didn’t you tell him not to come?”

 

Tony sighed. “Deep down I know he’s not to blame for what happened. He wasn’t in control of his actions. It’s… pretty hard to reconcile that with what I saw but I know it’s the truth. Besides, we need every person here we can get. You may not have noticed, kid, but this thing is pretty serious.”

 

Peter was looking at Tony with clear admiration. “I don’t think I could do that, Mr. Stark.”

 

Tony gave a half-grin. “I’m sure you could, kiddo.”

 

***

 

Steve was attempting to make himself heard over the chaos that had erupted at Bucky’s announcement. After Peter had hurried after Tony, the others had taken to hurling various accusations at Bucky and Steve without allowing them a rebuttal.

 

Rhodey had reappeared, and while he did not join in the fray he also did nothing to defend Steve or Bucky. Instead he leaned back against the wall, watching the pandemonium unfold with a far away look on his face.

 

The onslaught only stopped with the reappearance of Peter and Tony, who still looked a bit pale but otherwise composed.

 

Everyone fell silent, regarding Tony with bated breath as he walked up to Bucky. “Shouldn’t have lost my cool like that,” Tony said. He then turned to the rest of the group. “I thought…it would be—easier to keep this to myself. I’m not much of a sharer, you know. Anyway, Bucky’s—not to blame for what happened. It’s taken some time, but I can see that now.” Tony locked eyes with Peter who gave him a reassuring nod.

 

Steve chimed in. “I took him to T’Challa. One of his best scientists worked on Bucky. She personally assured me that Hydra’s influence is gone from Bucky’s mind.”

 

Tony nodded. Steve saw the pain in his eyes and expression but his voice was quite calm when he spoke. “I forgive you,” he said to Bucky softly.

 

Bucky opened his mouth, then closed it again. He looked completely thunder struck. “I—“

 

Tony shook his head. “Don’t say anything.” He extended his hand. Bucky regarded it uncertainly, then shook it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you thought! :D


	5. Chapter 5

Tony regarded the Chitauri energy core with a furrowed brow. Banner’s notes indicated that he’d been trying to characterize the core’s energy signature. Tony had finished that work, and was now painstakingly combing through the data in an attempt to find something useful. He’d been subjecting the core to a number of different chemicals and conditions to see if he could alter its energy emission, but to no avail.

 

Sighing, he rested his head in his hands, absentmindedly flipping through Bruce’s notes without really seeing them. The last several days since his confrontation with Bucky had been difficult. Laying his soul bare like that wasn’t something he was used to. He felt like the rest of the team was looking at him differently, which he supposed could be a figment of his own paranoia, but he still found it grating. This, Tony mused, was why he so often kept things to himself.

 

One good thing that had come from the confrontation was that he and Peter were speaking again. In fact, Peter was treating Tony as normally as he ever had done. Tony was pleasantly surprised and a little perplexed that Peter still seemed to admire him after everything that he had told him. Tony certainly felt that he had shattered Peter’s illusion of him as a fearless hero.

 

Peter had moved on from hand-to-hand combat and was now cycling through different types of training with everyone else. It was hard to imagine that the team had ever been without him. He kept their spirits up with his nonstop jabbering and was an easy target for teasing. With no prompting, the Avengers had become Peter’s advisors, protectors, and surrogate family.

 

Tony refocused on Banner’s papers to see a small symbol that he hadn’t noticed before etched in a corner: “γ”. Tony felt waves of realization wash over him as he shook his head in utter disbelief. “What are the fucking odds?” he muttered to himself. He was just instructing F.R.I.D.A.Y. to bring up his most recent rendering of the Chitauri energy core when a knock sounded at the lab’s door.

 

“Not now!” Tony shouted. “Critical breakthrough happening!”

 

The door opened anyway. It was Steve, who had the grace to look apologetic. “Sorry, Tony, but… you need to come upstairs. _Now_.”

 

Steve’s tone kept Tony from protesting. Bewildered, Tony followed him. As they ascended the stairs F.R.I.D.A.Y. spoke. “Unauthorized person in the compound, boss.”

 

“What?! How did they get in?” demanded Tony.

F.R.I.D.A.Y. did not deign to respond. Steve and Tony entered the main entrance room of the compound where the others had already gathered.

 

Peter was looking stunned. “Mr. Stark!” he yelled. “He came through a portal in the _floor_ —“

 

“I apologize for the entrance, Mr. Stark,” interrupted the intruder. He wore a strangely billowing cloak and an odd pendant around his neck. “I am Dr. Stephen Strange. I come with information that may be of use to you and your companions. I, too, have been monitoring the the Chitauri ship from my sanctum but… additional intelligence has just come to light that I would like to make you aware of. Specifically, a ship just crash landed near my residence. Its occupants claimed to know you.”

 

Tony was still trying to recover from the man’s bizarre appearance and the way that his cloak seemed to defy the laws of physics when a second golden portal appeared in the floor. Tony backed away in shock. “Wh-what…”

 

From the portal emerged three men, one of whom Tony frankly thought that he would never see again. “Banner?!” he cried.

 

The others reacted similarly, rushing forward to greet the man who was very unmistakably Dr. Bruce Banner. 

 

Tony gaped, mouth opening and closing in a complete lack of articulation. Finally, he gathered his wits enough to croak, “Are those my clothes?!”

 

Bruce gave him a lopsided grin. “Hey, Tony.”

 

“You!” Clint shouted in agitation.

 

Tony turned to see a clearly furious Clint regarding Loki with disgust. “What is _he_ doing here?” he demanded.

 

“He is here under my supervision,” boomed another voice. Tony turned to see Thor, whom he hardly recognized with short hair and an eye patch.

 

“What the _hell_ is going on?” Sam asked faintly.

 

“I think I will allow your companions to explain,” said Dr. Strange, stepping back slightly.

 

Loki and Thor exchanged dark haunted looks. Tony felt his stomach contract with fear. Whatever was coming, it wasn’t going to be good.

 

Bruce staggered forward with a pained expression. “We were attacked,” he said. “Tony… he’s coming.”

 

“Who?” asked Tony faintly. “Do you mean the Chitauri warship?”

 

“I mean who’s on it,” answered Bruce cryptically.

 

“The mad Titan,” muttered Thor darkly from behind Bruce.

 

“Who?” repeated Tony blankly.

 

“Thanos,” said Loki weakly. “Thanos has come to Earth.”

 

Dr. Strange cleared his throat importantly, then turned to the others. “Do you know what this is?” he asked, raising his strange pendant for them to inspect.

 

Tony saw that the golden pendant was in the shape of an eye inscribed with unintelligible markings. It emitted a subtle green glow that seemed to be coming from a stone contained at its center.

 

At once, Tony turned to look at Vision, comprehension dawning slowly on his face. Dr. Strange grinned. “Ah, yes. You seem to understand me. It is an infinity stone,” said Dr. Strange evenly, addressing the group. “One of six, each tied to different aspects of our universe and each with its own abilities. Direct contact with one is enough to kill most mortals.”

 

“What do they do?” asked Natasha hesitantly.

 

“Allow me to show you,” said Dr. Strange. He turned at random to a nearby coffee table, seized one of Tony’s glass paperweights and dropped it on the ground where it shattered.

 

Before Tony could so much as protest, Dr. Strange raised his hands which were surrounded by glowing green symbols from the pendant. Immediately, the glass paperweight reassembled itself and returned to his hand as the group watched in disbelief.

 

“So… it fixes stuff?” asked Scott.

 

“It controls the flow of time,” said Dr. Strange loftily. “It can even undo entire events… but at a great and terrible cost. It disrupts the natural order of things, creating alternate time lines with unimaginable consequences. Even I, with all of my training and study, dare not wield it to alter significant events except in the direst circumstances.”

 

The Avengers were silent as they contemplated this stunning announcement.

 

 “How far back can you alter things?” Peter asked softly.

 

Dr. Strange turned to him and Tony saw his features contort with something like sympathy. “I cannot grant you whatever it is you seek to undo.”

 

Peter bowed his head, nodding.

 

Dr. Strange strode over to Vision, indicating the stone in the android’s forehead. “This,” he said quietly. “Is yet another of the six infinity stones. The mind stone. It is what gives your friend here his sentience.”

 

Vision looked uncharacteristically shaken by this news. “I—“ he muttered, touching the stone in his head. He lapsed into contemplative silence.

 

“And most of you in this room have seen a third infinity stone,” continued Strange, unperturbed by Vision’s disturbed expression. “The tesseract.”

 

At this, several people shot glares at Loki, who winced. “The tesseract is a vessel for the space stone. For many years it belonged to the Asgaardians… but it fell into human hands shortly after the second world war. Ultimately, it ended up with S.H.I.E.L.D.”

 

“Where it was _stolen_ ,” said Clint pointedly, gesturing at Loki.

 

Loki, however, looked as if he had suddenly understood. “He’s coming for them,” he said numbly.

 

Dr. Strange nodded. “If he manages to unite all six of them, he will be truly unstoppable. The Universe will fall to Thanos. All of us must unite to defeat him. What you call the battle of New York was only small taste of his forces. This time, he will come personally.”

 

“You’re saying that Thanos was behind that, too?!” asked Steve incredulously.

 

“He promised Loki power over the Earth in return for something.” Dr. Strange looked at Loki intensely, as if waiting for something. Loki sighed deeply, then reached into his shirt pocket. In his trembling hand, he held the Tesseract.

 

 A predictable uproar ensued. “Loki!” Thor admonished. “How--?”

 

“I took it as Asgaard fell,” said Loki quietly. “Not even Ragnarok would have destroyed this tesseract.”

 

“So you’re saying that three of the six infinity stones are here in this compound?” asked Peter in alarm.

 

“I guess we don’t need to wonder about where the Chitauri ship is landing anymore,” said Steve wryly.

 

Bruce grimaced. “We were apprehended by Thanos as we approached Earth. We only escaped because of… well, they call themselves the ‘Guardians of the Galaxy.’”

 

“Many Asgaardians aboard our ship died,” said Thor solemnly. “What’s left of them are sheltering at Strange’s sanctum.”

 

“The only thing standing between Thanos and Earth is the Guardians of the Galaxy,” said Strange somberly. “We must prepare for battle.”


	6. Chapter 6

Thanos descended upon Earth, a feeling of ultimate peace filling him. He knew that the time had come, at last, to fulfill his destiny. The only question now was what that destiny would cost him. On Titan, they’d called him mad, unfeeling, and deranged. In truth, he was none of those things. He was _pragmatic_. _Resourceful_. He alone was willing to make sacrifices while those with weaker wills allowed their society to collapse.

 

Thanos knew that in the end, he was still only prolonging the inevitable. Eventually, the Universe would run out of resources and life itself would cease to exist. He’d made peace with that eventuality long ago, but he was determined to stave it off as long as possible. He owed the Universe that much.

 

As the battles on Earth began, Thanos received correspondence from Glaive. He reported that the Avengers were using gamma weapons to incapacitate their Chitauri forces. Thanos smirked at the report, supremely unconcerned. He disconnected the correspondence without bothering to respond to Glaive. It was no matter. The Chitauri were only a side show meant to distract from the real war.  A war that he had all but won already.

 

Thanos hesitated for the first time when retrieving the soul stone from Vormir. Never in his darkest musings had he imagined that his destiny would cost him his favorite daughter. Though it pained him, he killed her.

 

The absolute fools calling themselves the Avengers and Guardians of the Galaxy had attempted to slow him, to thwart him, but in the end they failed. Their wills were ultimately as weak as the wills of the Titan people. They refused to sacrifice anything to keep him from his goal.

 

Finally, the work and pain of years came to fruition with the simple snap of his fingers. He felt the raw power, the limitless energy coursing through him as half of the Universe’s population disintegrated to dust. It felt _right._ His mission achieved at last, he returned to the planet where he’d first found Gamora to grieve her and rest. He knew that the Universe didn’t understand what he’d done, but that didn’t matter. Eventually, their descendants would remember him as their savior.

 

***

“Mr. Stark? I don’t feel so good.”

 

Tony snapped his head up, looking around at Peter as a terrible choking force worked its way up his throat. He stared at the kid, unable to process what some small part of him already knew was happening. Tony opened his mouth and said the first thing he could think of. “You’re alright.” He felt the awfulness of the lie searing through his chest as he stood rooted to the spot, horrified.

 

“I don’t know… I don’t know what’s happening,” Peter said, paling rapidly. He attempted to walk towards Tony but instead lurched forward, falling.

 

Tony caught him reflexively, clumsily trying to steady him. _No. It shouldn’t be Peter. Why was it Peter? Why wasn’t it him?_ Tony’s brain was frozen. _Thanos did it. They’d lost._

Peter’s hands scrabbled helplessly at Tony’s back. “I don’t want to go. I don’t want to go. Please,” the kid was _begging_ him. And there was nothing that Tony could do. Not a damn thing.

 

Peter’s legs finally gave out beneath him and he fell onto his back as Tony lowered him to the ground. Peter looked blankly into space for a few heartbeats before turning a tortured gaze on Tony. Then, Peter said the worst thing he could possibly have said, something that would haunt Tony’s every waking moment from that moment forward. “I’m sorry.”

 

Tony wanted to shake Peter, to tell him under no circumstances was he allowed to die. He remembered sitting with Peter after that fight with Bucky, talking about how they both couldn’t bear the thought of losing anyone else.

 

Peter crumbled to dust before his eyes and Tony felt a vital part of himself crumble with him. _The kid. Not the kid. Anything but the kid._ Tony knelt in the ashes that had moments before been Peter, squeezing his eyes shut tight against the onslaught of eviscerating pain that cut through his shock.  

 

Tony had no idea how long he knelt there, but at some point he felt the pain turn to rage. It coursed white-hot through his veins, obliterating everything in its path. He swallowed hard, dispelling his grief with an angry shake of his head. _No. If the power to do this exists, the power to undo it has to exist too._

Tony forced himself to rise, turning towards the only living being left on Titan. “Take me back to Earth,” he demanded.

**Author's Note:**

> Please let me know what you think! I live for feedback/comments !


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